Monday, January 30, 2012 me at the table, please!

Breakfast, lunch, especially dinnertime….  I HATE them.  It used to be such a beloved time of the day where I got to sit and enjoy scrumptious food.  It was either a time to sit peacefully in front of the TV and watch bad television or an excuse to socialize and entertain.  Now, its just torture. 

As you will soon hear about, breastfeeding was a horrible experience for me.  So the whole obligation of feeding another human started off rough for me from the very beginning.  Once I gave up nursing with Number 1, all went pretty well until Number 2 rolled up on us.  He was picky, irritable, and screamed through every meal.  He had to be spoon fed way after he should have been spoon fed.  Really, if we want to make sure he gets enough food, we still are spoon feeding him at the age of three.  It got to a point when he was a baby that I would just feed him as quickly as I could before the rest of us had dinner so that I could get him in the swing or in front of a show, ANY show that would keep his attention, so that we could at least hear each other at the table.  As he got a bit older and couldn’t be pushed off to the side any longer, he had to join us at the table.  From 2 years old to the present I do not know how he has grown.  He never really eats.  Every meal is a dreadful battle to the finish.  Usually ending with him the victor and Truthful Mommy the incapable loser.  It becomes a game for them I think. They see us get to our wits end and they think it is funny.   Maybe it is just a great way for my middle man to get some more attention.  We once butted heads for 2 hours over eating a pancake drenched in syrup!!  What child won’t eat that?  And what mommy MAKES their child eat that??   He was impossible.  Truthful daddy didn’t make it any more enjoyable.  My solution was to teach him to make his own choices.  If he chooses not to eat, he will eventually be hungry.  No snacking, no treats, no nothing if he can’t eat his meal.  I was just sure he wouldn’t do that more than a few times!  Boy was I wrong!!  The Husband’s thought was “when he wakes up in the middle of the night starving, it will be our problem!”   When we were instructed by his pediatrician to stop letting him ruin the meal for us, it was as hard for the Husband to stop his dinner routine of nagging Number 2 through the entire meal as it was for Number 2 to learn how to act and eat at the dinner table.  Still we continue to find the balance at 3 years of age, but it is better.

Number 3 came to be in our world and he was an angel.  He was a great eater from day one!  Easy breezy.  Then one day, someone snuck into his room, switched out our angel with this other, equally cute, baby and NOW he is the dinner villain.  The pride of his new ability to pick up his own food has been replaced with a “how dare you make me feed myself” attitude.  I have THREE kids people.  I cannot and will not spoon-feed all of them, especially when they have already shown their cards and I know they can do it by themselves!  I now have a full realization of how mommies of multiple kids get skinny.  They don’t get a chance to eat.  Number 3 not only throws his food on the ground, he launches it at the rest of the family.  It would not be uncommon to catch a glimpse into our window at any point during dinner and see Number 1 falling out of her chair because she is the wiggle worm, Number 2 blowing bubbles in his milk because he would definitely not be eating or using good table manners, Number 3 launching his fork across the table at Number 2, Daddy pointing his finger intensely at any one of them to get them to behave, and the Truthful Mommy crying, staring right back at you out the window and sipping a glass of wine.  All of that happening at the same time.  

You can be sure, we say grace before every meal.  BUT, prior to meeting the gang around the table, I feel certain that the Husband and I should be standing together in the kitchen and praying for some sanity to meet us at the dinner table. 

Sometimes, in the midst of the not-controlled-choas, I look defeated-ly into the Husbands eyes and say “welcome home honey.”  Sometimes I don’t look at anyone, I just wail sarcastically “thanks a lot for another lovely meal!!!”  And stomp upstairs to my bathtub escape.  The reaction from me is dictated by lots of factors…what sip of wine am I on, what decibel have we reached, how much food hit the floor, how many times did I hear “I don’t yike this food”….just to name a few.

I know, right now so many of you are wanting to give me advice on how you keep your angels so compliant at the table, and how you get them to clean their plate.  And by all means, if you have 3 or more children then throw them at me, but I assure you, I have tried them all.  Most recently we did the timer scheme where we have 15 minutes of silent dinner.  When only mommy and daddy can speak.  For some reason, at 15 months, Number 3 does not understand this concept.  Alas, we try.  Our biggest problem is that we can’t don’t stick with anything long enough for it to take.  It either begins to feel hopeless or it becomes too much work.  However, I soldier through.  I prepare a healthy dinner…and only one.  I put food on the table for us to eat as a family, because in the end that is the most important thing.  Especially to the Wonderful Husband.  I hold out hope that this family mealtime routine will one day be the most precious time of the day for us; a time to catch up on the lives of our children and to laugh together about what torture mealtime used to be.  

For those of you that are my friends and have wondered why the Truthful Mommy doesn’t entertain you anymore.  Now you know.  I used to thrive on dinner parties, having company, and impromptu gatherings.  I feel certain that it will all return again someday.  But for now, I wouldn’t subject anyone to any form of chow time at my house!!!

The Truthful Husband was out of town tonight; we had popcorn and hot cocoa and we didn’t sit at the table.  It was lovely.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

This is a warning.....from the emergency broadcasting system

I am constantly looking for ways to save the Truthful Husband some money.  He is a money stresser…stressor, whatever, he chronically stresses out about money.  Financially speaking, all situations are bleak in our world.  So, I like to find ways to ease the grip for him.  Of course, my love for shopping is not to be tampered with in any way.  I am already a frugal shopper as it is, I…will….not….let….it….go. Can’t do it. So, I recently suggested that we cancel our cable.  I read somewhere that it could save you something like $700 a year and that sounded worth it to me.  He didn’t jump nearly as high as I thought he would at my selfless suggestion.  The husband NEVER watches TV.  He works at work, plays with my kids, works at home, plays some more, eats, stays busy….never watches TV.  So I could not figure out for the life of me why he would not think this was the best idea I had ever had.  He did agree it sounded like a good idea and began researching it, finding options, seeing how we could watch television on antenna.  All that.  But he kept coming up with excuses like, “you won’t be able to watch Young and the Restless on HULU” or “you can’t record all of your shows and watch them at your convenience with these cheaper options.”  I think I will survive if I don’t see Victor marry his two time daughter-in-law and mother to his grandchildren ever again!!

Something that almost changed my mind was, “There will be no more Nick Jr or Disney.”  Oooooh, that is the very best babysitter that I have ever met and the only way to get anything accomplished during the day.  I always felt like it was a really inexpensive babysitter, but when I take into consideration that it was actually costing me $700 extra a year, I decided I was being duped.   So, I never waivered.  They can watch Sesame Street and the Electric Company on PBS just like I did growing up!

It became a game for me, I think.  Everyone, especially the Husband, assumed that I would be the one to crack when the rubber really hit the road on pulling the switch.  I watch A LOT of television.  I tape about 15 shows and actually watch them all.  It is my window into worlds I will never know, my escape from reality, my brainless time to myself.  The Husband wanted to be really, really sure that I was aware of what I was about to get myself into. 

Come to find out quite a bit of the hesitation from the Husband is that there is no ESPN.  AH HA!!  So, being the understanding wife that I am, I told him I was okay with whatever he decided to do.  But, I reminded him, do not blame me for the cable bill.  I was willing to go with the rabbit ears!!   He conferred with friends about his dilemma and they promised to let him come over to watch football anytime.  At the very least, our neighbors agreed to leave their blinds open so he could see their big screen TV through the window.  So, with all the options open to him for watching sports he made the call.  Don’t worry, we kept high speed internet so we can get ESPN3 on our computers.  I think he will survive. 

Two days ago when the devastation actually hit our home we were in the middle of Jake and the Neverland Pirates.  The screen went to black.  My son screeched….”WHAT HAPPENED TO MY SHOOOOOOOOOWS???”   My mom, who lives downstairs in a hip mother-in-law suite, comes barreling up the stairs at top speed, “WHAT JUST HAPPENED??  I THOUGHT THIS WAS BEING TURNED OFF TOMORROW”   My phone rings… is the husband calling me from work.  “Hey, they might turn the cable off tonight instead of tomorrow and I just wanted to warn you.”  WARN me???   The dictionary version of "to warn" equals to give notice of danger, impending evil, possible harm, or anything else unfavorable.  Really??  Is this where we have come?  That losing cable might just be worthy of a code-red-like warning??  I laugh, the grandma sulks and the son is devastated.  My daughter still has no concept of the fact that she cannot pause or rewind her shows.  What ever will she do?  The grandma is still desperately trying to find the next cable representative that can help her fix this horrible situation that her daughter and son-in-law have put her in. 

I, on the other hand, am enjoying the innocence of public, free television.  I caught myself laughing out loud at “Leave It To Beaver” last night.  I am pretty sure I learned some very valuable parenting lessons from Ward and June for when my boys are grown and ready to head out to pick up their lady for a date. I have gotten more done since the crisis event than I have in a long time.  My little guys are fixed on Elmo and learning their ABC’s and 123’s from the puppets that I grew up loving.  Number 2 can hardly wait to get home from preschool to see what is on.  The kids know now that they can’t watch just anything at their beck and call.  It is now a new adventure waiting for them behind the screen.  It has been used as a great incentive to get their chores done, their teeth brushed, their lunch eaten more quickly so that they will not miss too much of their newly-beloved PBS shows. 

No more on-demand-Victor and his old shriveled up lips hiding under the ‘stach.  No more Disney Channel that must be turned off promptly at 10am or else my kids may learn things they could just as easily learn from Victor Newman and the team on any soap opera.  I am happy with free television.  We have not imploded.  We are still here and I think we may just be better off.  

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Showers are NOT over-rated

As you may recall from some of the recent posts (I know I can’t forget it), my daughter tells me, as honestly as she possibly can, “you are fat like Mr Smee.”  So, I go promptly to the closest inexpensive gym and become a member.  That was about 3 months ago and I have been a faithful once-a-month attendee ever since!  You also remember I have 3 children under the age of 7.  Yes, I tell you, this gym does have child care.  Why, you may ask, are you not attending regularly and taking advantage of 2 beautiful hours of childcare?  Why, I ask myself, did I not join an expensive gym where I can exercise, sauna, hot tub, yoga and shower???  Man, I was not thinking.  My gym is graciously inexpensive, which appealed nicely to the Truthful Husband for many reasons; mostly because he knows my track record with exercise bandwagons.  I fall off promptly.  But this gym does not have the bells and whistles.   Not even a shower.  At the very least, this stay at home mommy should have checked to be sure there was a shower at the gym.  This unadded feature does not help the fact that I rarely get a chance to shower as it is.  If I do go to the gym, and possibly get sweaty (rarely) then I pick up the kids, go home, life gets busy and I stay dirty all day.  YUCK.  Maybe that is why I don’t go.  Yes, that is my excuse. 

Since I am all about being honest here, I have often begged my husband to get us a YMCA membership.  I can just see the paradise in it.  Dropping the little guys off for a fun, activity filled, hour or so at the nursery, me heading poolside to… whatever I wish.  Nap, read, chat, play, swim, tan.  It wouldn’t matter.  I cannot remember the last time I came in contact with a pool where I didn’t have to watch some little person in my care very closely so they wouldn’t drown.  Oh…yes, actually I do remember a time several months ago when, at the edge of a breakdown, I made reservations at a hotel 5 miles from my home and went for 2 nights!!   It was a mommycation.  I highly recommend them!  The husband had just come back from back-to-back, extended out-of-town trips.  I was at my wits end.  “I…must…get…out” was all I could say with droopy shoulders and a distant gaze.  The husband willingly stepped aside and wished me a lovely mommycation.  It was just what I needed.  Speaking of, I feel like I might be overdue for another one!

My advice to those of you making a choice on a gym membership:  Check for a shower.  That is THE very least you can do for yourself.  I am thinking that if mine had a complete bathroom, I might just drop the kids off to shower, makeup, and even DRY my hair.  Wow, what a treat that would be!

Sunday, January 22, 2012

The "don't forget MY banner" Banner

I don’t really like to craft anymore.  I used to.  So I have it in my blood.  I also do not like to let my kids help me when I do craft because, as “teachable” of a moment as that is, it just makes the craft project that much more difficult to accomplish.  So, when my almost 6 year old asked me to make sure she had a banner for her upcoming party, I had to come up with something.  It is afterall, still no-spend January (still more about that later), so I could not just hop on etsy and grab something already beautifully made.  That would cost money. 

I also used to scrapbook.  Don’t like to do that anymore either.  Oh how I love me some digital photobooks from shutterfly!!  Because I used to and don't anymore, I have a lot of scrapbooking paper that needs to be put to good use.  That is one of the beautiful things about no-spend month.  You clean out a lot of things you have had a hard time finding a use for, and you have to get creative.  Anyway, I got to work on a banner that turned out so great that I had to post.  Now, here is where the Truthful Mommy will differ from some other blogs.  A lot of things have to come together to make this project “easy.”  I am not going to lie and say all of you can whip this up in no time and make it worth your precious time. 

For one, if it is not no-spend time for you, buy one!!  The printable ones on etsy are great and really inexpensive.  Those ladies on there are so super creative.  Two, you need lots of fun card stock and scrapbooking paper.  So if you don’t already have that lying around, or you can’t find it on the clearance rack, it may not be worth the investment in paper.  It is not a fast fix banner.  You also should have knowledge of photoshop or some other editing software.  If all of those things fall in to place for you then go for it.  Or if you are just a big fan of DIY crafts, then it can be a fun one…

1-Decide what your banner will say.  For us we needed 9 letters.  So, find enough pieces of 12x12 solid color card stock, 12x12 fun patterned paper, and 8.5 x 11 solid card stock.   Then find 3 different sized circles to trace.  I used Tupperware and lids. 

Tip:  do one letter first and put it all together before you make the whole banner to make sure you like the sizes, etc.  

2-Trace the largest circle onto the 12x12 solid sheets, cut out.  Trace the middle circle onto the patterned sheets, cut out. 

3-Lay the smaller pattern circles on top of the large solid circles to make sure you like the color combos and how they go together.  Lay them out in the order you like them best. 

4-download some fun free fonts from and print really large letters onto the 8.5x11 solid card stock sheets.  (this is where you have to be internet, downloading and editing software savvy)  Or you could just use the fonts that are already loaded on your computer.  I used “wood sticks” from the Dafont site because my outdoorsy girl wants a camping party in the middle of Jan. 

5-Print the letters at the size you want them.  Make sure they fit inside the smallest circle you chose.  I made mine about 5.5 inches tall. 

6-glue the smallest to the middle circle.  Then that to the largest.  And there you have it! 

7-Punch holes in the top, string them together and then I just taped the top to the string so that they don’t slide around.  I am sure there is a better way.  But I am always looking for the easy way out! 

So, there it is!!  The birthday girl’s banner.  Of course, yours can say whatever you please.   She is happy, I am finished, and the husband likes that it was free!

Saturday, January 21, 2012

I can do cool stuff too...

So, it IS possible for me to do alot of stuff.  I'm a busy momma.  I just recently took a new work-at-home job, I have a photography business, I have a big dirty house, 3 fun and lively kids, I am the social coordinator for my friends and my LIFE class at church.  I don't do any of it very well, but I get it done.  Apparently, now I am a blogger, too.  Any who, I promise that when this Truthful Mommy is able to pull off fairly impressive things, I am going to share them with you!!  Maybe even guide you along to help you do them and inspire you to get out of your comfort zone.  

When Number 1 turned 6 recently she asked for a camping party.  Considering that she has a January birthday, that was going to have to simply be a theme.  Not a bona fide camping affair.  Just the mention of it stressed me out a little.  I could just see my home being invaded by lots of frozen, loud, sugar crazed kids at some point of the evening. But, a camping party with weeney roasts and marshmallow toasting sounded frugal, if nothing else.  Hot dogs are cheap and kids rarely even need a bun.  Mustard and Ketchup, check, already own that.  Chips and…canned fruit of some sort to appear to be concerned about the health of the attendees...can be done on the cheap for sure!

Then the Princess tells me that I need to be sure that she has a cool Happy Birthday banner like I made for Numbers 2 and 3.  Ok, to be fair, I went ALL OUT for Number 1’s first birthday.  It was a bit much, but he was my very last first birthday.  I made him a rockin birthday sign and had his cute little mug on EVERYTHING.  When Number 2’s birthday rolled around 2 months later all I had to do was add his name on the end and it was done!  Their banner was much too boyish for her, so I was on the search for a banner.  It had to be homemade and it had to be free.  We are doing no-spend January so this is where I had to get creative.   She also informed me that she didn’t want cupcakes; she wanted a real cake and it needed to be decorated with tents.  That is what I get for asking.  What do I look like, The Next Great Baker???  Well, I may just be……and, it turns, out I can still be crafty if necessary.

The how-to for the banner is long, so I will post that tomorrow.  Stay tuned.  But for today I will show you the stuff that I made for the party and my very amateur attempt at a decorated camping cake.  I searched around on Pinterest and googled camping parties and to my surprise there were ALOT of ideas.  Apparently we are not the first family to come up with such a cool birthday party.   I got some really great ideas; put them all together and this is what happened:

I made the invitation with Photoshop Elements.  I made the background with a grunge texture.  I wish that I could remember for you what the name of the texture is or where I got it from.  But I can tell you that you can get all kinds of awesome free textures from places like The Coffe Shop Blog and Brusheezy.  Most likely this one came from one of those places.  Then I downloaded a free font for the wood sticks from Dafont.

This was only easy with the knowledge of Photoshop and knowing how to find my way around fonts and textures.  As was the case for the rest of the things to follow.  It was time consuming but mostly free, if you don't count the paper it was printed on and the ink.  However, if textures and downloading free fonts sounds like a foreign language to you, I say go on Etsy, search for someone that designs things for parties and buy it from them.  They are quite creative and talented on there!!  They design just about anything and you can simply pay for the design, they will email you the file and off you go printing!  Easy cheezy.  

Next I attempted some labels for the give aways, trail mix bar, and nature hunt bags.  Not at all necessary.  You could always take a sharpie, write on a brown sack and be done with it.  But I was so happy with my invitation that I took on the endeavor.

We printed these circles onto sticker paper, cut them out and put them on the outside of plastic snack baggies then filled the baggies with mini marshmallows, honey graham bears, and M&Ms for a s'more-to-go.  
These were also printed on sticker paper, cut out and put on the outside of brown paper bags.  The plan was to set up a Trail Mix Bar so that the kids could mix their own concoction.  It never happened.  We had way to much activity to fill the time and never had time to open the bar.   But it is a great idea!  I have 20 bags labled like this if anyone is in need of some Trail Mix Bar bags.....

The kids LOVED the nature hunt.  They each got a bag and had to go out to the woods with Ranger Daddy and find everything on their list.  Once they found their items they had to come back and claim their prize. The prize was their choice of a flashlight or bug catcher. 
 (Got both of those at the Dollar Tree!!)

So, after a nature hunt, roasting weeny's and mallows by the bonfire, busting open a pinata and much horse-playing in the tents....I relunctantly allowed them ALL to come into the house for cake.  And here is the finished product....

The trees are sugar cones piped with the star tip.  (I know, that sounds like I know what I am talking about, but I really just took direction from instructions online)  The tents are graham crackers iced, the logs in the campfire are broken pretzels, the stones are chocolate covered nuts, the tiny marshmallows came out of a hot cocoa packet and placed on tootpicks, and the stream is laffy taffy.  Then for the grande finale, I lit all the candles in a bunch to look like a real campfire.  It was a big hit!!

So there you have it.  I made it happen.  The kids had a blast, the parents were impressed and Number 1 was a very happy camper!!  Hope this inspires you to do something out of your comfort zone!!

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Brain Muscles Cease

You may remember my story about Number 1 asking me why I had so many crumples on my forehead.  After that extremely honest interaction with my sweet princess, I swiftly snatched up a living social deal for Botox.
So one morning not so long ago, I sent Number 2 off to preschool, Number 1 off on a playdate and put the grandma up to watching Number 3 while I went to have my brain pumped full of paralyzing toxins that may or may not cause botulism.  But hey, I was doing it for myself.  I want it, I am not scared of needles, I am not afraid of approved drugs.  So off I went. 
It was fabulous.  It didn’t hurt, the doctor was super energetic and fun and I may even go back again in 4 months or so.  Afterall, they honor the deal price I got for the second treatment, genius.  So, Truthful Mommy jumped in her car after her lovely visit with the Botox lady and was on her way.  On the car ride home I chatted with a dear friend about how annoying the rest of our friends (that we love dearly) can be sometimes. We laughed at each others ridiculous mishaps as parents, she gave me some great blog material, and then I was home.  HOME!?!?!???  I TOTALLY forgot to pick up Number 1 at her playdate!  Was the botulism already setting in and my brain was already atrophied?  No, just a bad mommy move.  I will say that this is the very first time I have ever forgotten to pick up one of my children.  But it felt pretty inadequate, nonetheless.  It was not a total disaster; the play date was only minutes away from our house. The other mommy would never know how inadaquate I really am and Number 1 would never know she was forgotten.  But the fact of the matter is…I forgot.  I was too busy going on and on about my toxic injections to rid me of my oh-so inconvenient crumples and chatting negatively with my girl, that I forgot my sweet child.  Get it together!!
For those of you curious about the botulism, I didn’t get it.  For those of you curious about the process in general, I say if you find a good deal with a reputable doc, go for it.  It doesn’t hurt and it is nice to see less signs of the stressful anxiousness that is usually oh-so apparent on my forehead!!

Sunday, January 15, 2012


Before I had children and even after I had Number 1 angel baby I had a long list of things I “would NEVER do or let my children do.”  Oh aren’t we so smart before we walk in these shoes.  For SURE my children would never whine.  I would be in full control of that.  Be sure, we don’t put up with it at our house.  We do all we can to discourage it.  We ignore them, we punish them if it gets out of hand.  Of course, you know, this Truthful Mommy gets to the end of her rope with incessant whining and does a bit of yelling.  So then what…I have taught them to stop whining and start yelling?  Believe me, the inconsistency is not lost on me.  On many occasions, I have even been known to yell, “Stop yelling at each other!!!!!”  Really?  If you are not a yeller and screamer, I covet your demeanor!  I wish that I were a soft-spoken, patient mommy.  But I am not.  That is my most constant prayer each and every day that God will give me patience and understanding with my children. 

No, I have not always been a yeller.  I didn’t yell at my friends, boy bands or sporting events.  My husband and I certainly don’t yell at each other.  We have too much respect for each other.  So why on earth did mommyhood bring out this terribly ugly trait in me?   I don’t yell constantly or immediately.  It takes quite a good deal of whining and disobedience to get me there.  But when I reach that boiling point, ridiculous phrases come out of my mouth in a very loud manner.  Of all the people in my life, these are the little ones that should have my undivided patience. I usually finish a crazy rant, slow down, step back, and realize I have a lot of apologizing to do.  Sometimes I DON’T slow down and step back and I just tell them they made me yell at them.  It must be someone else’s fault.  It cannot simply be that I am a yeller and that I have no self-control.  It MUST be that they just don’t know when to stop misbehaving and they pushed me over the edge. 

This is not the kind of mommy I want to be.  Many many more posts to come on patience!  I am a work in progress.  But one thing I know for sure is that this is not the character trait I want my kids to remember from their childhood.  So, my progress continues.  My fervent prayers for God’s grace continue.  One day I will stop all the mommy drama!!

Maybe back when I was so smart about parenting and vowing to “never” I should have affirmed to never yell, scream and be dramatic in my house.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Who is the funniest of them all?

Princess Number 1 came running in the kitchen, got my attention and said, “This is my best pooting sound EVER!”  She proceeded to make this ever so life-like poot sound with her mouth.  My first reaction was to tell her that ladies don’t make potty noises.  But her sound was actually very much like a real one and her face so proud, that I could not hold back an authentic belly laugh.  So, now my response has only affirmed her actions and I feel certain that I will be hearing that poot rendition many more times.  Number 1 is always looking for a laugh.  Bless her heart, humor is not her strong suit.  She wants desperately to be funny and make people laugh.  And, for her sweet little self image, we oblige every now and then and laugh—not so authentically.  She has gotten smarter over time, and is on to us.  She stops to ask us if that is a real laugh or not.  Uh oh. 

Her brother, on the other hand is hilarious.  He loves potty talk at the table and REALLY loves his wee wee.  We have to do the opposite with him.  We have to keep our genuine laughs under our breath and turn away as we tell him that it is completely inappropriate to talk like that at the dinner table.  Or to run around shaking his naked booty for all the world to see.  It is not just unbefitting humor that he is in to.  He truly comes up with the funniest stuff out of no where.  His timing is impeccable and his facial expressions are to die for.  One time we were in the restroom at church.  I walked in to the stall with him for assistance, he is three after all.  He gave me a big sigh and said “can I get a little pwivacy here pwease??”  Giggles streamed from every occupied stall around me, including mine.  Laughter like this does not send him running inside his shell, he thrives on it.  He looked up and me with fiery pride at his stand-up achievement. 

Of course, anytime Number 1 sees him get a laugh, she proceeds to copy him.  It is never the same.   My goal now must be to remind her of all the many things that she is good at and nurture those.  Otherwise, we could just hear her best-poot-noise-EVER for many days to come.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

A Morning in the Life

Ahhhh, there it is.  The “who’s life is this?” day has returned.  Ok, look, 6am is NOT morning.  When you are a stay at home mommy, and no one has to be at school until 8:30, 6am is still nighty night time.  So, when Number 3 decides for the last 4 nights to wake at such an appalling hour, I decide he needs to cry it out.  So from 6 to 7:15 he screams on and off.  I really showed him.

We come downstairs and have our milk/coffee/snuggle time, which lasts through the commercial break of the news and ends promptly when the news returns.  I give him cereal to chew on while I fix some oatmeal.  Most of the cereal ends up in the floor for the Truthful Doggie. 

Number 2 comes down at the correct hour.  Not because he is such a great sleeper, but because we have trained him that he is not allowed to come out of his room until his clock turns number 7!  What a great teachable moment, don’t you agree?  He learns the value of time, how to read a clock, how to obey his parents, and it was all sponsored by the number 7! 

He begs me to let him go wake up his sissy.  I tell him several times, in an ever-so-nice and patient voice, “no we can’t wake her up yet.”  He keeps on and on and on…..  Finally, Truthful Mommy breaks, once again, and yells, “I said NO!”  He hears me.  Despite my eager efforts to stop the yelling in my house, that seems to be the only way to get them to take me seriously.  UGH. 

Oatmeal is ready for all (my sleeping beauty still sleeps).  They don’t do a terrible job eating their breakfast except that, as usual, it takes Number 2 over an hour to eat one small bowl.  Oh well, that is one hour I don’t have to worry about what he might get in to.  He tells me at one point, “mommy, I am finished.  See, you can see the bottom of my bowl.” He has now shoved his oatmeal up around the edges of his bowl.  Where do they learn this stuff?  He is 3!

Number 3 enjoys his bowl.  I give him some Tylenol because, obviously, he has something terribly wrong with him to be crying hysterically at such an un-Godly hour for many days in a row.  I do truly believe that his crying, snotty nose and incessant chewing on his hand are leading me to believe there is a molar coming in.  I will help him with the Tylenol.  Maybe it will allow him to take a good nap later this morning.  I start to take away his tray, he grabs one more piece of cereal…he throws up all over himself and the chair.  Too much snot and mucus.  Mess number 1….

He gets changed into a cute little one piece suit that I love so much at this age.  As I am getting the throw up under control I notice he is playing in the dog bowl.   Why do my boys love that so?  Cute, clean outfit is soaked as is my floor.  Oh well, they will both dry. 

Number 2 falls off the chair and hurts his hip and arm.  Cries hysterically.  I noticed that I heard something hit the ground before him.  After picking him up, I see……my 30mm fixed lens!!  This would equate to about a $450 play toy.  “Where did this come from??”  Apparently the ground is not a great place for my camera bag these days. Number 3 found it and was throwing it like a ball.  GREAT.   Calgon take me away.  It is not even 9 o’clock yet!!

Number 3 went down for a nap at 9:30.  I hope that this means he will take 2 naps today, else, this will prove to be a very long evening.  Off to coupon blogs I go.  I have to find some pretty amazing deals on diapers, wipes and milk.  Well, there is never a deal on milk, but this is no-spend January, so I will do my best.  May head to the store and never return......

Monday, January 9, 2012

Stop trying to out-mommy

Why do we all feel like we need to "out mommy" each other??  Aren't all most of our kids so great in their own way no matter how we try to mess them up??  As a new blogger I was a bit terrified of all the hateful comments I was about to let myself be subject to.  I have a dear friend with an amazing blog about the art of yard selling and making money on ebay.  Her goal was to help people.  She wanted to show them that there was a way to add to their family's income and have fun doing it.  Her writing was amazing, she blew up quickly in popularity, and she really did help a lot of people.  But many times she would receive comments about how terrible it was to leave her 3 girls to yard sale every Saturday morning.  Let me just say, she is a precious stay-at-home-mommy and she IS one of those super moms that I so despise in my posts.  She leaves them home WITH THEIR FATHER for a few hours on Saturday morning.  What good did it do for other women to comment that she was doing anything wrong???  Is it their business, I ask?  I don't think so.  Her blog was not about being a mommy.  It was about helping others learn a new skill.  She never once asked anyone to share their opinion about her yard selling addiction, much less her mothering skills. 

My thought is, if you don't like something someone is doing in a blog...don't read it, they are not writing it for you.   Why bother yourself with something that bothers you??  I don't understand it.  That is what blogging is all about.  Giving us all the opportunity to say what we want to say, and the good Lord knows we all have different opinions. So, if you can't help but leave opinionated comments, maybe you should start your own blog.  Now, listen, if someone asks your opinion, then I say let em have it!!!  But if it is unsolicited, why waste your breath?  Your comment is likely to get deleted anyway.  All you have done in the process is made a great mommy question herself.  And do any of us really need that? 

There are so many posts in this one subject I could go on forever.  To Baby Wise or not to Baby Wise.  To spank or not to spank.  To listen to whining or not to listen.  To vaccinate or not to vaccinate.  To let them cry or not.  To feed them junk food or not.  To let yourself become a short order cook or not.  On and on and on I could go.  But the important thing to remember is:  To tell your friends your opinion on any of these issues and many, many more is just a lost friendship waiting to happen.  I have moderately strong opinions on most of these subjects.  And, because I now have my own blog where my opinion is abundant, I may just divulge those opinions at a later date.  But I learned very early on, that even if a friend asks my opinion on a subject regarding their children, I tread very lightly with the answer.  Usually they don't really want to know what you would do.  Rarely do they actually change what they are doing just because you gave your "expert" advice.  My expert advice to saving friendships?  IF THEY ASK, tell them what you do, then remind them that all families are different and they have to make choices that enable their family to run more efficiently.  Careful ladies!  Just because they are venting to you about how terrible it is to still be sleep deprived after 18 months IS NOT them asking for your guidance.  The actual words, "What did you do," must come out of their mouths for them to care.

Sometimes, even when we would like a change, we know we just can't do it.  Sometimes, we just want to vent and have another mommy tell us we are great and there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  Listen, kids grow out of just about everything.  Don't loose a friendship or cause another amazing lady to question herself just because you don't know how to hold your tongue.  Reading a blog that you don't agree with? move on.  You have too many to choose from to waste your time.  And for heaven's sake, please stop trying to out mommy each other!!!  We are all amazing and we don't all do it pretty!

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Out of the mouths of babes...

Truthfulness runs in my family, apparently.  Out of the mouths of babes, they say.  Let me take you back a bit and tell you about some fierce honesty I got from my 5 year old.  When the kids were planning their Halloween costumes, they decided on the “Jake and the Neverland Pirates” theme.  Number 1 would be Izzy, Number 2 would be Jake and Number 3 would be Cubby.  “Daddy you can be Captain Hook and Mommy you will be Mr. Smee.”  Why do I have to be Mr. Smee???  “Cause you are fat like Mr. Smee.”  Oh my.  I have had 3 kids and I am no skinny girl.  But ouch, that one hurt.  Realizing that she didn’t even smirk when she said it made me see that she was just telling it like it is.  Who needs a mirror, really? 

Three nights later we are lying in bed reading a book and giggling and she says to me, “mommy why do you have all those crumples on your forehead?”  Ok, look.  I am not that old.  Fat and crumply are not adjectives that I was hoping to have used to describe me at this juncture of my life!  I laughed her off, tried to explain the crumples as best I could and moved on with the giggling.

Needless to say, I have since joined an inexpensive gym and bought a living social deal for botox!!  Here comes the TRUTH from me.  I joined the gym 3 months ago and I have been 3 times.  At this rate, I can be Fat Albert this Halloween. 

Friday, January 6, 2012

Wouldn't you know?? Never happens...

Wouldn’t you know it??  The day after I start a blog about the chaos that is life in my house, we have a peaceful, lovely, mostly whine free, beautiful day.  Seriously, and I am not going to complain.  Not one kid came into my room until almost 8am!!  That is awesome.  Then when they did come in they snuggled with me and watched a show so that I could wake up slowly.  Not one time did Number 2 say, “I wanna go downstairs NOW and I want milk NOW!”  This would be the first time EVER for both of those things to happen. 

Once we made our way downstairs I got “I don’t yike school” and “I don’t have to go to school” from Number 2.  But no fights. I spent the whole day yesterday cleaning the kitchen, so that was a lovely feeling when we entered into the heart of the house.  Some new delish coffee I got for Christmas was ready to brew and breakfast went smoothly.  Which also never happens.  Once it was go time he pitched a bit of a fit, but that is ok with me if that is all we get today.  It was a minor, surface fit.  I can handle.  No yelling from this mommy this morning. 

I decided with a clean kitchen (notice I do not mention the rest of the house) and no major work to be done, I should take Numbers 1 and 3 out somewhere.  Since we are on a “no-spend” month it had to be free.  (more on our no-spend month at a later date) We have a membership to our local kids museum so we packed a lunch and headed on our way.  It went equally as awesome as the morning had gone.  Well, except for the black eye that poor Number 3 received when he walked right into a handle on a stationery bike in the exercise section of the museum. But I still will not let that ruin my chaos free post.

While eating lunch, Number 3 didn’t throw one piece of food on the floor.  NEVER happens.  After our enjoyable lunch we headed to pick up Number 2 from preschool and vowed to keep our little outing a secret.  For some reason I feel such guilt when we do something fun and someone gets left out.  I really must get over that.  I am sure Number 2 had a blast at school. 

I really should go on a run while 2 and 3 are napping; that would really round out this lovely day.  We are having 60 degree weather in January, after all.  Probably won’t do that.  Have lots of adult clothes to be laundered and that does not sound fun today.  I have lots of well-intentioned thoughts. 

So far so good,  I feel the need to post this now, before the 6pm witching hour rolls around. I was going to wait and post at the end of the day to let you know if it all went so smoothly, but I am afraid.  The calm before the storm, perhaps?  Maybe my kids could sense that I had decided to air our dirty laundry and felt the need to give me nothing to work with today.  I am good with that.  Don’t worry, there will be plenty of airing still to be done.  But I just had to share.  I looked all day for something to tell you about and I came up very short.  Wouldn’t you know?  After all my complaining and venting,  I AM doing it pretty.  Well, except for the fact that I never showered before we left the house and my hair didn’t change its shaped from how it was in the bed.  But I did put on mascara and jeans, no sweats for this Truthful Mommy today. 

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Where to start with the truth??

I sat down and I typed and then I deleted.  Then I typed and deleted.  Repeat..repeat.  How on earth do you start your first post?  Especially when you are willing to write a post that will expose so much "stuff."  Things happen to me on a daily basis that make me think, really?  did that just happen??  Is this really my life?  I pictured something much different, as I am sure most of us did.  Especially if you are reading this blog, I imagine you did.  My house is NEVER clean, my kids are not clean as much as they should be, my dog is also never clean.  When I am clean I am not "complete."  When do I have enough time to take a shower (usually with all 3 kids) AND put on make up and do my hair??  Even when I make it to the shower I don't look like it by the time the husband comes home because I surely didn't have time to dry the hair, so it is a frizzy, embarrassing mess.  Poor guy.  He married a pretty girl.  He is the best, though.  I am almost certain that he thinks I am still beautiful all the time.  At least he loves me unconditionally and that makes me feel like perfection.  So, life is not perfectly baked casseroles, crafty projects, homemade ANYTHING (unless it is going to save Truthful Daddy a good bit of money),  a clean home, or even a happy home sometimes for me.  I get impatient, I get ugly, I get hateful and I get selfish alot.  Alot more than I want to admit.  But here I go.  I am willing to really put myself out there for those of you that need to hear that you are not alone.  And let me say, if you do not relate...this is just not the blog to spend your time on!  I am about to get really really REAL here. 

My plan is to lighten the load for us moms with a little humility and, hopefully, some humor.  It is not to spout on and on about how miserable of a mom and wife I am.  I am actually a pretty great one.  I am just not pretty and perfect about it all the time.  I am no super hero and my family is not under any spell.  They would tell you the same. 

  My eagerness to put it all out there, you may ask???  I got so discouraged reading all of the blogs that were about Super-Mom's. They have 15 kids, they coupon, they craft, they cook every meal, they make home-made playdoh & steep their own vanilla, & they blog!!  Also, every baking session, project, and small moment is also a "teachable moment" for the kids. REALLY???!?  I don't know how that is possible.  I hope it is.  I admit, I am jealous of their ability to make it all happen & still shower everyday.  But that is just not how it is in my house.  So, hang in there with me and stay tuned for some Truth!